“I love life, because it gave me you. I love you, because you’re my life.”
– John Lennon
Although we aren’t alone in this world, we feel like that sometimes. Somebody can say that we don’t need the other half. But… I was tired of my companions Independence and Freedom. And although my mind constantly reassured me that I don’t need anyone, my heart whispered opposite. To share my concerns and problems, to share the joy and happiness of life, to experience the adventure of the world and not to be alone in bed every night with my thoughts… I decided for a change, but the wisdom showed why the status “single” is good for me.
I don’t know if my demands were so exaggerated, or something else. However, finding the “imperfectly perfect one” after some time was like looking for a needle in a haystack. Later it was rather “searching for a diamond in the vast and inhospitable desert”. I was beginning to be frustrated by the increasing number of unhappy attempts. I was sad, the tears fell often on the pillow. My sanity was jeered loudly with the words “I was right”. My poor heart. So I wandered, slowly losing the strength to live. I enjoyed a few things which kept the flame of a desire to continue. One year, two years, three plus one and I reluctantly gave up. With regret, I had to admit defeat. My opponent was stronger. At that time, I knew only misery and despair. The path was the realization, that my destiny is to be alone. Without anyone… But my heart didn’t want to give up the fight so easily. “True love exists, I know it. Everyone has soul mate. It is somewhere, you just need to go on…” This elusive and little hope whispered to me every day and I was willing to give it another chance. I was older again and this start of the year looked like normal. But I had no idea, that the heart was already working on its promise…
Before Christmas, I got a message from a familiar man who I had met more than four years ago. His original intention at that time? To create me a proper insurance. He had been very attractive, but the age difference and my immaturity unanimously had said “no”. As I also knew, he was son of my mother’s friend, who had known me since childhood. Whenever I met her, we talked at least several minutes. Pleasant, friendly and nice lady 🙂 That was why he added me to his friends on Facebook. Initially, I didn’t pay too much attention, even after his surprising and very beautiful wishes for Christmas and the New Year. But I, for unknown reason, didn’t respond. Then longer, more precisely the eighteenth day of January, I remembered it and felt uncomfortable. “Why I didn’t send something nice?” But when I had a chat window open, my head boycotted. I had no idea what to write. Nervousness? Insecurity? The only and wisest solution was to send ordinary smiley 🙂 To my delight, followed very funny, nice and long conversation. My day immediately changed and I felt wonderful. Do you want to know the result a few months later? 🙂
I feel like princess in a fairy tale, who was at the last minute saved by the prince on a silver horse. The color of his car, which I also fell in love 🙂 I started to live fully again, enjoying every moment with him. The more we know each other, the more I realize how much we have in common. Interests, values and opinions are very similar. Of course, the conformity isn’t foolproof, and sometimes calm tone of voice turns into louder. But today, I can not imagine my life with someone else. I got the opportunity and believe me, my sanity was paralyzed 🙂 and amazed, that someone so amazing has been in my neighborhood, basically a few streets away. However, I am thankful for him. He brought the shining sun full of energy into my dark, uncertain and lonely life. And not only I, but also my heart are very grateful.
PS: This is for you, my love.